Mercy in Disguise

Please forgive us for neglecting the blog for so long! There has been a lot going on...

First of all, "Mercy in Disguise" was exactly that. The Thursday dress rehearsal felt like a total disaster. The stage managers and room moms had a hard time figuring out when their classes were supposed to go onstage, since a number of the dances ran back-to-back with no "lights down" between them, and most of the dances weren't to songs with lyrics that could be easily identified. There were also a number of technical difficulties in the lighting, set, and props, which is also understandable, seeing as all of those areas were WAY more complicated than usual. On top of all that, Miriam (who taught all three Wee classes and Basic 2, AND was our Production Manager) got sick and was unable to dance.

Afterwards, as we picked up the pieces (literally), Rachael, Katherine, and I were somehow able to laugh. Earlier that day, one of our friends had prayed for a catastrophe, and her prayer had been answered. There were way too many things for us to fix in the 24 hours before the first performance. It was out of our hands. God made very, very sure that we knew ANY success could not be attributed to our own efforts.

Friday came. We tried to take care of the "big" issues. I talked to the head sound and lights guy to straighten out some confusion, and sent out some information about which dance was which. Miriam met with the stage managers and went through the whole production, addressing many issues. Rachael showed the set people where all the pieces were stored when offstage (one of the problems on Thursday was that the set movers couldn't find the stuff they were supposed to move), and personally helped out the props crew, since they literally had their hands full.

So much more happened that I don't even know about. Without us even asking, people stepped up and took care of issues that had arisen the previous evening.

Two of the room moms wired themselves with walkie-talkies and headsets to communicate between the backstage area and the dressing rooms. Two other room moms took it upon themselves to keep track of which dance was going on and notify the other room moms when they were supposed to take their girls backstage. Our awesome stage managers annotated their line-up sheets with descriptions of each class's costume, so that they could identify the girls better. The head sound and lights guy worked out a system that ran much more smoothly.

Everywhere we looked, people found ways to help and stepped into the gaps. And what was even more amazing, I had peace. At the time, I couldn't see most of the things that were coming together. In fact, I had the final test for a dual-enrollment English class that afternoon. Normally I would have been pulling my hair out, stressed and irritable and ready to wring someone's neck. But not that day. I was nervous for a little while, and my adrenaline was definitely up, but by the afternoon I wasn't worried at all. In fact, I was excited.

The dancers showed up at the church. The audience started arriving. The opening slideshow played. The lights went down. All the teachers filed onstage, together with four of our guy dancers, for the first dance: "Bring It On," by Steven Curtis Chapman, choreographed for us by Celeste Wickware from Huntsville.

We waited onstage in the dark, posed in various postures of discouragement, fear, and sadness. The song was strikingly appropriate.

"I didn't go looking for trouble

And I'm not gonna fight needlessly

But I'm not gonna hide in a bubble

If trouble comes for me.

I can feel my heart beating faster.

I can tell something's coming down.

But if it's gonna make me grow stronger...

Then bring it on!

Let the lightning flash,

Let the thunder roll,

Let the storm winds blow;

Bring it on! 

Let me be made weak

So I'll know the strength

Of the One who's strong;

Bring it on!"

For me, at least, that dance was exhilarating to perform. I literally got goose bumps near the end, when we all punched our fists in the air and stared straight into the audience. Here we were, all the teachers onstage at once, at the beginning of the first performance. All we really knew was that the dress rehearsal had been a disaster. We'd done our best, but we were out of time. This was it. Whatever happened now, good or bad, was in God's hands. Here we go, I thought. Bring it on. And, God, You better show up.

"I don't want to sound like some hero

'Cause it's God alone that my hope is in.

But I'm not gonna run from the very things

That will drive me closer to Him!

So bring it on!"

The dances started rolling. The first several were a blur, as all of my dances were early in the performance and we had several quick costume changes. But the craziness at the beginning left most of the teachers free to help out backstage during the rest of the presentation, which was a very good thing! 

At the intermission, people told us, "It's running so smoothly!" SO many things fell into place and just worked. There were glitches, sure. But there was a vast improvement from the night before. When we stood up at the end to give our closing comments, we all knew that God did it! We were absolutely certain that it wasn't us. And that was success. 

We're called "The King's Praise Ballet," but it's so easy to try to take the praise for ourselves. All the little details that we'd worked so hard on for the past months... from costumes to choreography, from props to printing, and from lineups to light cues... we would have been tempted to say, "Look what I did!" if everything had gone smoothly.

But no... God gave us a rocky dress rehearsal to remind us that we can't control anything. Problems came up that we'd never anticipated, and once we were sure that we couldn't fix them, God did. He was glorified in our weakness. The story of Joseph was told, emphasizing the greatness of a sovereign God who works bad things out for good, and we learned the same lesson in the process. 

Every trial, every technical difficulty, every logistical issue, and every frustration served as an opportunity for God to show up. Every single one of those problems truly was a "Mercy in Disguise." Glory to God! Great things HE has done!

In Him I Am

Alone I am nothing but a lump of clay;
In Christ I am fashioned, molded day by day.

On my own, I'm finite, not enough for a task;
In Him I have strength - never will I lack.

Apart from Him I worry, get tired and overwhelmed.
In Him I rest secure, by His love compelled.

My motive for working is based in His work done.
It's not my skill or merit - apart from Him, there's none.

So I can live and do, and yet in Him just be.
And when others see what's done, I pray they see Christ, not me.

To Him belongs the power, priority and praise.
So I rest and leave the "how's" to Him, as in prayer I raise...

"Grant time, grant peace, give guidance, strength and much wisdom.
Be Lord of all the details; Holy Spirit, come.

Have Your way in me, in this, in all that is ahead.
I trust You to continue, as You've always faithful led."


Praying through details about dance classes and workshops, and how to transition to other teachers & leaders (as I'll be getting married in January and moving away!), I was starting to feel overwhelmed again last night... But God reminded me that I need to keep trusting Him; He's in control. He WILL faithfully lead as I take one step at a time.

We serve an Awesome God!

Looking Back... God is Faithful

As one who likes to plan ahead, it’s always hard when I can’t know the future. If I could look down the road a few years and see what my current experiences are preparing me for, it seems like life would be a whole lot better! But then, if I knew the future, I would have no reason to trust God. My times are in His hands – and it’s in the daily trusting, taking one step at a time as He shows me the path, that I learn to follow Him without reserve.

Looking back over the years, I’m amazed at how God planned my life and prepared me for the things ahead. I never would have woven my story in the way He has, but slowly He is creating a beautiful tapestry. I’m in awe of His faithfulness in giving me experiences and lessons at just the right time to prepare me for what He knew I’d be facing later.

When I started to write poems before age 9 – short and silly as they were – I never imagined that many years later, at age 19, I would sit down to write lyrics for songs for an original musical. But God knew; He gave me an enjoyment of words that rhyme, and used my silly poems that matured over the years to prepare me. Those poems prepared me for the task of counting syllables of rhyming lines that would be turned into a song by a friend whom He gave the gift of composing.

I still find it hard to believe that at age 8 I wrote a play to practice and perform at my birthday party, and then did it again at age 10. God gave me an enjoyment of theatre even back then... and little did I know where it would lead. At age 14 He allowed me to go to a drama camp, where, as I learned about the various jobs associated with the production process, I declared that I would never be a director. He must have laughed when, exactly a year later, I directed my first musical. It was truly God that turned this shy girl that didn’t think she could lead into a director working on her 7th musical and a teacher going in to her 4th year of ballet classes. I’ve learned to “never say never” when God’s involved.

At age 10 I learned to use the sewing machine to sew doll clothes, and by age 13, I had sewn my first dress. Over the years, God granted me an enjoyment of sewing, as I crafted skirts and dresses for myself and friends and matching clothes for nieces and nephews. I never expected that at age 17 I’d start sewing costumes for musicals, or that the skill would continue to come in useful to sew and alter dance costumes, be a valuable asset to the costume crews at college, and now oversee finding and making costumes for a cast of nearly 60, training other young girls to sew in the process. In the future, I hope this skill will come in useful as I establish a home and family of my own.

I could go on; there are people who have shaped who I am, things I studied that I never thought would be useful, only to find myself needing that knowledge, and experiences God’s given me – extremely hard at times – that prepared me to walk through the next thing He had planned. Some of those have helped me to relate to and reach others.

My God is a big God. He knows what I need when I don’t. Even now, He is preparing me for things I could never imagine. I may not know right now why I’m walking the path that I am, doing what I’m doing, and learning what He’s teaching me, but my faithful Father does.

Life is such an adventure with Him. I look forward to looking back in a year… five years… ten years… or even at the end of my life, and seeing how He used this time. Maybe then, things that are dim now will suddenly become clear.

My life is not a series of random events; it has a purpose – I have a reason for being where I am right now. It’s an amazing thing, to know that the God who created this universe created me for a purpose, and is involved in my day-to-day life.

With each day, He is preparing me to serve Him for His glory, and though things may not make sense now, I am learning to trust Him with each step. Do I do it perfectly? Definitely not. But with each lesson and each test, God always proves Himself faithful and trustworthy. It’s my prayer that I will continue to follow Him… no matter where He leads.

"The LORD will fulfill His purpose for me; Your love, O LORD, endures forever - do not abandon the work of Your hands." - Psalm 138:8

Can't Stop Giving Praise

It's late - I should be in bed. And I'm going - truly I am... soon.

But I just can't stop giving praise! The dress rehearsal tonight went so well - things are truly coming together. Of course there were a few mishaps, but on a whole, it went great. And I know that God will do something wonderful these next two nights.

God has given me such peace with this musical. It has been the most difficult by far, but also the least stressful. I have prayed for peace, and I know others have, and God has answered.

With each prior musical I struggled with despair at times, wondering if things would really smooth out. Each time they did as God worked in amazing ways - and each new one gave me greater faith to trust Him for the next one. Beyond Bethlehem has been hard - very hard, taking up hours on end (I spent 1o hours at Fountain of Grace today...), but it has been enjoyable. I've had moments of wavering, but haven't stressed out.

Praise God for His peace! And praise Him for rest. Tomorrow (er, today...) is another full one.

Photo Credit: Samantha Brooks

Thankful for my Dad

My family always helps a lot with each production. Mom gets to see choreography and read things first, and is one I bounce ideas off of. Jubilee is also great for discussing ideas with - she's not afraid to tell me if something looks or sounds silly. Mom and Jubilee are always willing to help set up/take down things before and after rehearsals. Elijah videotapes if he's available, and Lydia helps in whatever way she can; this time she's running the spotlight!

For "Beyond Bethlehem," my dad has really gone the extra mile. He's always helped and supported each production, from setting things up to running sound, to acting in it if I need him to, although memorization is hard for him. But for this one, he has devoted a lot of time to researching and ordering the right theatre fixtures (lights) and control equipment for me, finding the best deal and lending me the money until I can pay them off (which should be soon!). He designed and built the stands to hang the lights on, since he could get the materials cheaper than we could order them ready-made. But, that meant he had to spend many extras hours buying, building, and testing them.

On Monday, we spent 7 hours at Fountain of Grace together. He set up the stands and hung each of the 8 fixtures as I organized costumes and props. He then tested the lights, focused them, and showed me how to control them, then patiently waited while I figured out the cues. Finally, around 8:45 PM we headed home, still not having eaten supper. Yet, he never complained.

The next day, he drove with me to pick up the backdrops I'm borrowing from a friend. They were dirty from having been stored in a barn, so he helped me wash them, even as it started to rain. After treating me to lunch, he helped me set up the dividers, then programmed the light cues while I hung the curtains. Things always take longer than you'd planned, and 5 hours had passed from the time we started out until the time we got home. After a quick supper (thanks to Jubilee and Mom's preparations) and only around an hour at home, it was back to Fountain of Grace for the evening rehearsal. He ran the light board for two hours, and then helped put things away before heading home.

I truly am blessed with a wonderful father - and a wonderful family. Thank you all for helping so much! These productions could never happen without you.

God is Amazing!

It never ceases to amaze me what our Awesome King, our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, does in this world. His works are wonderful!

The King's Courts is still in its beginning stages as a ministry. God has given me a vision for something great, and He will bring it to pass in His time. In order for things to happen, however, it takes step-by-step work and many small, time-consuming tasks that build upon each other. The work of the The King's Courts is beyond what I could do in my own strength, but as God wills, He will accomplish all that He has called me to do.

All praise and glory goes to Him!

“How awesome is the LORD Most High, the great King over all the earth!” - Psalm 47:2