This song has a special place in my heart. It has been used
in both “King’s Theatre” presentations of “Esther-Ordinary Faith,” the first
production Anna directed back in 2005, along with the more recent performance
last summer. (In fact, the picture at the top of this blog is from last summer's version of "Esther.") In the musical, Esther dances to or sings the song as she
contemplates the task ahead of her… the task that only she can complete. Over
the last 7 years since the first “Esther-Ordinary Faith” production, that song
has challenged me every time I take a moment to think about it.
“Now, all I have is
To be faithful, to be
And to shine, lighting
up the darkness
Right now I really
have no choice
But to voice the
truth to the nations
a generation looking
For such a time as
this/ I was placed upon the earth
To hear the voice of
God/ and do His will, whatever it is.
For such a time as
this/ for now and all the days He gives
I am here! I am here!
And I am his/ For such a time as this
Can’t change what’s
happened till now
But we can change what will be
By living holiness
So that the world may see Jesus!”
Right now, God has placed me in the position to help
administrate some of "The King's Praise Ballet" as Anna "moves
on". Along with about 6 other girls, I face the task of replacing my amazing
teacher and director. We have many varied interests and goals for our lives,
from missions to film-making to music to college...but right now, God has put us
here. Right now, our duty is to be the best teachers, choreographers,
seamstresses, administrators, and washers
of mirrors that we can be. It's been amazing to see how for each task, there was
someone perfectly suited for and trained in that area. (Aside from the mirror
washing. That just sort of happens as it happens.)
We're all still in high school. We all still have things to
learn. For me, humility, gentleness, and time management are areas that need
work. But as we go about our tasks, as we face challenges in teaching 4 year
olds, or struggle to keep our priorities straight so we have time to choreograph,
God teaches us to depend on Him for our strength, to please Him in the
smallest, most tedious, or uninteresting detail.
For such a time as this, He has
placed me here. He has given me
responsibilities and duties and opportunities to glorify Him. I often forget
that. I often forget that the everyday things, even sweeping the kitchen floor
and solving physics problems so I can get on to "more important
things", are important. God's will for me is to do everything as if I were
doing it for Him. That doesn't just go for the final ballet performances, or
playing music durng my church service. That means everything, every moment, right
"As long as it is day, we must do the work of Him who sent Me. Night is coming when no one can
work." (John 9:4)
I have a limited number of days. I don't know when my time
is up. "Now...all I have is now." I know what my job is. I know what
I need to do, right now. My choice is either to do it, and do it for God, or to
miss the opportunities He's given me.
Where has He placed you? Are you His? Are you ready and
willing to do His will, whatever it is? He has placed you exactly where you are
with the gifts and abilities you have, for such a time as this.
Alone I am nothing but a lump of clay;
In Christ I am fashioned, molded day by day.
On my own, I'm finite, not enough for a task;
In Him I have strength - never will I lack.
Apart from Him I worry, get tired and overwhelmed.
In Him I rest secure, by His love compelled.
My motive for working is based in His work done.
It's not my skill or merit - apart from Him, there's none.
So I can live and do, and yet in Him just be.
And when others see what's done, I pray they see Christ, not me.
To Him belongs the power, priority and praise.
So I rest and leave the "how's" to Him, as in prayer I raise...
"Grant time, grant peace, give guidance, strength and much wisdom.
Be Lord of all the details; Holy Spirit, come.
Have Your way in me, in this, in all that is ahead.
I trust You to continue, as You've always faithful led."
through details about dance classes and workshops, and how to transition to other teachers & leaders (as I'll be getting married in January and moving away!), I was starting to
feel overwhelmed again last night... But God reminded me that I need to
keep trusting Him; He's in control. He WILL faithfully lead as I take
one step at a time.
"Enter His gates with thanksgiving and His courts with praise. Give thanks to Him and praise His Name. For the LORD is good and His love endures forever, His faithfulness continues through all generations." - Psalm 100:4-5